the sweetness of victory

Well here we are with just a few days left of the 2024 Paris Summer Olympics.

I LOVE the Olympics. I always have and I always will. I find it inspiring on so so many levels. I live for the stories of athletes from all different sports and all different backgrounds and all different countries. It just gives me a thrill when records are broken. And to see the way athletes from all walks of life come together to support one another in difficult moments and times of victory alike. It’s just humanity at its best in many ways and I think it is precious and beautiful and uplifting and brings hope to my heart.

Unfortunately with social media comes a TON of spoilers. I am very intentional about not using social media on days that I want to watch Paris Primetime to see my favorite events. I want the suspense and the thrill of not knowing what the result is even though I could very easily look it up.

I noticed something interesting about humans very early on in this year’s games. I was spending time with someone and a news notification appeared on their phone with a spoiler. They read the spoiler headline and put their phone away. Then they asked if I wanted to know what the notification said. My response—of course—was NO!

But in that moment I knew. I knew the result of the event I anticipated watching that evening. Because there was no clicking or great interest in the article. It was simple and clear cut. Team USA had won gold.

I knew because the same response would not have occurred had Team USA lost. If we had lost, that would have meant that an athlete made a mistake or not performed as expected. That would have been a STORY. That would have required clicking deeper and deeper looking for a REASON. That would have induced a search for an EXPLANATION.

Victory is sweet and beautiful and celebrated, but tragedy brings the headlines. Like a train wreck, an Olympic medal lost is what REALLY gets people talking.

I know a lot of people are tired of hearing about Simone Biles, but let’s talk about the GOAT for a moment here. 3 years ago in Tokyo, the world watched in shock as she walked away from competition to address her mental health. You had some people who admired her for taking care of herself and many people who called her a QUITTER for letting down her country on the Olympic stage. The story of Simone Biles stepping back from the competition made HEADLINES and created a debate that way outlasted any of the medal announcements that week.

I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, I’m saying it’s an interesting thing. That so many people are more interested in consuming information about people’s struggles, challenges, and “failures” than we are about celebrating their victories. Even in many of the autobiographies and memories out there, most of the book is filled with all the things that almost killed you in pursuit of your dreams. Very little of the book contains an explanation of how you celebrated your success and how you let that success/achievement/victory direct your path moving forward.

I think it’s because everyone can see themselves in the struggle. We identify with struggle SO MUCH. It touches us and makes us feel less alone. More like our experience is universal to humanity. Which, though struggle sucks, is somewhat comforting. Right?

Victory seems a bit more distant. Not everyone tastes the sweetness. Success is not universal in the way that people interpret the word to mean. It is less relatable. Not everyone can win an Olympic Gold. Right?

Well. If you go with what we’ve accepted as conventional success and victory, you’re right.

But what if we adjusted our definition of success and victory? Because not everyone starts out with the same advantages. I’m not sure how great Shakespeare would have been at the shot put. Or if Mozart would have demonstrated an affinity for basketball. Would Picaso have been a world-renowned surfer? Mostly we will never know.

We each have a unique set of skills, challenges, traumas, support systems, educational opportunities, physical limitations, mental/emotional obstacles, passions, and economic resources. These differences mean that our victories look unique as well:

• Athletic Podiums

• Grammys, Oscars, Emmys, Tonys, etc. etc. etc.

• Artist Residencies

• Museum/Gallery Displays

• The New York Times Bestsellers list

• A significant number of followers on a social media platform

• Sold out concerts

• Making name partner

• Graduating from:

  • High School

  • Community College

  • University

  • Grad School

  • Med School

  • Law School

  • Nursing School

  • etc.

• Quitting:

  • Smoking

  • Drugs

  • Alcohol

  • etc.

• Getting a promotion or a raise

• Surviving:

  • Trauma (physical or emotional)

  • An Eating Disorder

  • ANY Mental Illness (depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety, BPD, schizophrenia, DID, etc. etc. etc.)

• Getting up after falling down

• Buying a home

• Advocating for yourself

• Refusing to accept less than you deserve

• Finding your tribe

• Getting out of debt

• Having a birthday or anniversary (of any kind)

• Fighting no matter what

• Not letting your illness (physical or mental) define you

• Winning an election or competition

• Finding a passion

• Pursuing a passion

• Becoming a parent (to a furry friend OR human OR both)

• Leaving a toxic relationship

I mean I was nervous to start the list because making a list means that something would inevitably accidentally be left off. And really, there isn’t ANYTHING that CAN’T be counted as a victory.

There is ALWAYS a reason to celebrate, guys. I’m serious. If we don’t celebrate what we might view as the “little stuff”, then we very well may end up with very little celebration in our life. It is up to us to recognize when we are successful and to build ourselves a monument to celebrate and commemorate the achievement (or…to do so for others…sometimes a friend pointing out a victory and planning a celebration is a super awesome gesture). Because it’s true that there are often more struggles than victories if we look to the world for definitions. And that’s no way to live.

Celebrating the “little stuff” creates an excitement and leads to more “little stufF” to celebrate. Which eventually becomes the “big stuff.” But even THAT doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter whether it is “big stuff” or “little stuff”. What matters is that it’s the “sweet stuff” that makes life worth living. And nothing says sweet like a celebration :)

PLEASE SHARE A FEW THINGS THAT YOU CONSIDER VICTORIES.

I want us to generate a HUGE list!